Washington has 2 of the worst mascots in the world

Hello everyone, my apologies to the DC Scene Blahg readers who have had nothing to read recently.

I wanted to bring attention to this hillarious article on cracked magazine (and by the way, cracked is a really good humor website. It’s so good that I almost wish the subpar magazine would be relaunched).


Nonetheless, the author of this article makes an organized list of the worst team names ever and the Redskins placed second on “Most racially insensitive” mascots behind a South African football team with the name “Dangerous Darkies” (a remnant from the Apartheid era).

Here’s the excerpt:
“Still in existence are the NFL’s Washington Redskins, who arguably have a pretty insulting name, as well. On the other hand, the use of that term to actually insult Indians is so outdated that kids these days probably think it refers to some sort of crunchy snack. However, concerned about the potential loss of this slur from our language, the team educationally provides a reminder in their logo. “

The 2nd school to be featured is Cardozo High School (in D.C.) which placed in the non-Threatening human category behind the Ghanan football team King Faisal Babies and the Cantralia High School orphans (nut ahead of the Ciaro Syrupmakers) with the team name the “Clerks.”:

‘The Cordozo Clerks are located near Washington D.C., which is still no excuse, because San Fernando Valley high schools never feel the need to name their teams the Pornstars.”

I would have to say that my undergraduate alma matta had a pretty silly team name the James Madison University Duke Dogs: There’s no such dog by that name, and when I tried to explain to my friend “our mascot with a crown on his head who thinks he’s royalty,” he responded “ohhh, so he’s a delusional dog?”

I might have been insulted if my friend didn’t go to neighboring Virginia Tech, which is one of the few schools that had an even worse mascot. As a general rule, Virginia Tech students should not be permitted to make fun of anyone else’s mascot. The Hokes would actually be a shoe-in in the above-list’s non-threatening animal category (cracked has UC Santa Cruz Banana Slugs and Columbia College Fighting Koalas on the list). My two questions for those at Virginia Tech, since I have not visited your college much and am not familiar with your relationship to your macot, is a) do you have a thanksgiving tradition where you try to chase him around your field with silverware on thanksgiving and try to eat him on thanksgiving and b) why not? it sounds like fun

And can we take a minute to reflect on local school University of Maryland? No matter how great their basketball, soccer, and lacrosse teams are, it’s hard to feel threatened by a turtle. Is their cross-country team’s primary strategy to lull their opponent into a sense of false confidence and hope that they take frequent breaks over the race course?



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